My hands hit the clammy mirrored wall behind my head, the black silk nightdress gathering around my waist. I watch in the mirrored ceiling as I spread my body out like a starfish, bending my knees away from the sticky sheets. It is a small house made of mirrors, every surface papered in glass.Īnd there I am. A locker crouching beside it, the black paint peeling off in ribbons. I blink as my cubicle flickers in the subdued light. The SleepSound can disguise the fire in my lungs only for so long before I jerk awake, gargling steam. It’s pumped in at night to detoxify our pores, rolling in waves through the dormitory, moulding to my skin. But when night falls in the dorms the demons stir, their eyes flashing white in the dark, looking for something to feed on. No man will ever want a companion who thinks too much. chastity-ruth says thinking too much robs you of your beauty. Night after night I lie awake, nothing but the Messages to distract me from my clamouring thoughts. We are like sponges, absorbing beauty, becoming more and more lovely as we dream. And we eves are more receptive when sleeping. The robotic voice spills down the walls and crawls along the floor, searching for a receptive ear. I can hear them now, sucking artificial heat into their lungs greedily, oblivious to me lying in my cot buzzing like an exposed wire. The hallmarks of too many nights spent burrowing a hole in my mattress, tossing and turning, yearning to join the perfectly synchronized breathing of my sisters. All I can see are dark circles under my eyes, a grey pallor like a dusting of ashes over my face.

The corrosion of vital organs.īut I cannot see these ‘vital organs’ in the mirrors. I am at the maximum permitted dosage of SleepSound, they say, eyes narrowed in suspicious concern. The chastities keep asking me why I can’t sleep. Only Ever Yours By Louise O'Neill: Book Extract Chapter: This YA smash hit was dubbed The Handmaid’s Tale meets Mean Girls, and lauded by writers as diverse as Jeanette Winterson and Marian Keyes, long before it started winning awards, and has now been reissued with an “adult cover”.Īn unsettlingly plausible read. They are punished, shamed and scolded for putting on weight.Īnd they have only one purpose: to serve men – as companions, concubines or chastities. Imagine a world where you’re judged entirely on your appearance.Ī world where your peers give you marks out of 10, and where selfies are the currency.īut in the dystopian world of Only Ever Yours, girls are made, not born. Only Ever Yours By Louise O'Neill: Book Review

Only Ever Yours by Louise O'Neill